Choose Action

“Please raise your hands if at any time between Kindergarten and 12th grade you have ever had to experience an active shooter drill.” 

Vice President Kamala Harris recently mentioned that she had asked a group of college age students to respond to that statement, and, as she noted, every single student raised their hand. For those of us in education, this is not surprising. As teachers, we know where the exits are, we know what object in our room is our weapon of choice, we know where we would barricade the students, and we know the visceral feeling of anxiety every time we have an active shooter drill.  

Yesterday, my 14 year old daughter called me from school to ask me about her ride home, and after I reassured her about her ride, she quickly said, “Mom, did you know that (school’s name) had a threat made against them?” I could hear the slight edge in her voice, and I responded, “No, I did not. I’m sorry. Are you okay?” She said, “Yes,” and then hung-up–like a typical 14 year old (AKA…without a goodbye).  

Threats to our schools are rampant. In Springfield, OH, where I went to college and did a field placement in one of the middle schools, students have been yo-yoed in and out of school for bomb threats based on unfounded and deeply racist suggestions concerning their Haitian residents. My own college was shut down because of these threats. 

The threat made against a nearby school via the Okay2Say tip line was also made to other schools across the country. Schools were sent scrambling to figure out what was a real threat versus an unfounded threat. 

As I chatted with a few people last night about all of this, the thought that kept coming to my mind was that our children are paying the price for the seeds of despair sewn by the adults in our country. Our children are raising their hands and claiming their place in the systemic trauma, because we as the adults have chosen division over healing, isolation over belonging, fear over hope, and violence over courage. 

I am a big believer in common sense gun laws. I believe that no one needs an AR-style weapon for hunting or even protection. Those weapons should be reserved for the military who, ironically, have a rigid set of standards and protections for gun ownership. I also believe that everyone who owns a gun should be held responsible to store that gun in a safe, away from the access of children.

I believe that those common sense steps will save lives, but they are only surface level solutions to issues deeply rooted in the soul of our country. We have to heal the larger wound. 

What might that look like? I do not claim to be an expert, but I think the process might look something like this: 

• Invest in your own mental health.

If you are not self-aware, self-regulated, and emotionally resilient, it is going to be impossible to gift that to other people. Practice the healing first on yourself. 

• Find someone you disagree with and have a conversation.

Practice the art of curiosity by asking them why they hold the beliefs they do, and before trying to prove them wrong, ask them another question. Curiosity builds relational bridges, and those bridges are what is needed in order for us to rebuild a sense of community across our nation. 

• Connect with a child or teenager who needs a mentor or simply someone safe enough with whom they can process the challenges of being an adolescent today.

Belonging is a core need of every human being and too many of our teenagers are feeling isolated and disconnected. They need adults who want to invest in their lives, not judge them or look down upon them. They need co-regulators and hope-givers. Be one. 

• Choose courage over violence.

We often think of violence as a physical act, but violence in today’s world comes in many forms. We commit verbal violence when we speak or write hateful, hurtful responses over text, email, or social media. We commit emotional violence when we use fear-mongering to gain power or control, and we commit mental violence when we withhold love or attention to punish another person. Courage looks like noticing those base instincts inside of us that want to use violence and then choosing the path of peace. Research and history have shown that violence only begets more violence. Courage to choose kindness, empathy, connection, compassion, or forgiveness will lead us, culturally, to a deeper experience of peace than we ever thought possible. 

I am not naïve to think that the next generation of students will not also raise their hands in affirmation to having experienced the impact of active shooter drills. I simply long for a day when parents no longer fear for their child’s life when they drop him or her off at school, when children no longer have the surge of anxiety when they hear a book drop in the hallway, when a 14 year old doesn’t feel the instinct to call home because she needs to hear the reassurance from her mom that everything is going to be okay, and when teachers feel the comfort of teaching for at least one year without a school shooting somewhere in our nation. There are ways we can make that happen. We just have to choose action. 

This post is made in deep sympathy and remembrance of the 42 who have died and the 91 who have been injured in 2024 due to school violence (everytownresearch.org).